The First Snowstorm of 2017
For me, there is something so energizing about a snowstorm... candles lit, firing burning, sipping warm tea and hot cocoa watching mother nature gently sprinkle her icy fairy dust upon us...
The next morning, the sun rose slowly as it filled the bright blue sky, making the snow sparkle.
Still calm, still quiet...
... as we walk across the powdery champaign sparkle, kicking and throwing it up with delight, I think to myself, what a magical moment!
Me, on my 33rd Birthday {back in July!}
As much as I love to be a photographer and write, I don't know that blogging is for me! I curated this post of photos back in July, after my 33rd birthday and then abondon it... like the 20 other blog posts I have queued up, and never posted...
I've done this for YEARS!
Why do I do this?
I think I'm afraid to share my personal life... what I hold most near and dear to me, I hold so close that I'm afraid to share. I've recently realized this about myself and after coaching myself through it (I'm such an internal thinker) I decided, well I'm not going to get much of anywhere if I don't share my work, my art.... my story!
So... here is me, turning 33 years old!
Personal | Happy Birthday Kyleigh
This is my niece, Kyleigh. She was the first niece I ever had and was born the year I graduated from college, I was 21. She was the first baby in the family and the first little model I ever had... This girl has been shot with every model of Nikon since the D200 (as you can see from the earlier photos). Anyone who knows me personally knows all about Kyleigh and how special she is to me. I'm not only her aunt, but her god mother and we also share the same middle name!
When I lived closer to home, we used to see each other often and she would run to the door in such excitement whenever I came to see her... we would spend every waking hour together on the weekends I stayed with her, when it was time to say goodbye we would both cry. The bond we share is so special and that is why I'm sharing, a little piece of my heart.
Today Kyleigh is 11 years old, say what? She has grown to be such a thoughtful, strong, beautiful inside and out, brave, flexible, empathetic, and lovable young girl.
Happy Birthday sweet girl!
Here are some of my favorite memories together
My Life Lately...
Lately I've been feeling pretty tired and uncomfortable. This seems to be the hardest time for most in the whole child rearing process. Currently I'm 36 weeks pregnant {and have gained about 50lbs). In addition... I feel like I have a 25 lb attachment on the front of me while trying to wrangle a 50 lb toddler in my arms. When I hold Sienna, she tends to sit on top of the bump... which feels awesome on my back {not}.
I've been feeling very blessed... yet feel myself getting overwhelmed with the thought of managing a newborn and a two year old all day every day. People suggest following the same schedule everyday... but the thought of trying to stick to a rigid schedule freaks me out! People also suggest "getting help" but help cost $$ and it just doesn't make sense for us. Because of this I've been pretty occupied both mentally and physically. When Justin {my husband} asked me what my New Years resolution for 2015 was going to be... my response was "to survive" lol.
In all of this, I've been thinking a lot about the April K Photography brand and where I want to take it. Right now I feel like I've reached a cross roads in my photography and really, I can go any way I want... it's figuring out which way I'll be most interested in and most passionate about. I've been thinking... a lot. I'm the type of person to hibernate and direct my energy inward to try and listen to my own voice and instincts while I figure things out... something that seems like it should be easy, but it's hard for me to hear over all the sounds social media and the thoughts and voices of others.
So I've been pretty quiet.
Listening.
Slowly I'm hearing and learning and gathering information about each possibility I have before me and it's very exciting. The thought of getting back out to shoot, full time, ONLY AFTER I've spent some solid years with my babies, exclusively, free of the stress that running a business can bring, really excites me. For a while I thought I had lost my passion, but it turns out I am just in a different spot in my life that needs more attention right now, and I'm perfectly OK with that.... because I believe that it's not about "having it all" it's about managing what's going on in my life, right now and enjoying the chapter i'm on. In turn, my creative juices will flourish and when I'm ready to devote more energy, great things will happen.
In the meantime, my goal is to put out more personal projects... believing that they will make me learn to not be afraid of making mistakes and to push myself beyond my known limits. As my focus has temporarily shifted to being a mother, I'm in the perfect position to not be so dependent on my income which in turn allows me the creative freedom I need to grow. In addition, I'm looking forward to taking on only a very niche clientele to offer a more 'boutique" and individualized experience in both weddings and newborns.
Stay tuned for more of my adventures!
xo,
April
quiet moments at home | personal project
quiet moments at home with Sienna...
the purpose of this project was to play with the harsh shadows created by the early afternoon sunshine. It was hard manipulating the blown out effect this time of day creates (plus the house next to us is white which reflects even brighter light) and balancing it with the dark appliances in my home. I also am working on my post processing of black and white conversions... they're so much more intricate than color.
Sienna at 18 months:
she is so curious and smart... she has been doing great at talking, it's almost like a parrot next to me some days. She is also going through her "little ripper" stage... the time when temper tantrums are perfected and climbing {and falling} off things is in... It's a challenging time but it's keeping me on my toes {and in shape!}
the girl loves water... we don't have room or do I care to spend money on a "water table"... we revert to the "good ole days" for this one and put a pot of cold soapy water in the sink with a few utensils...
she is starting to help mama around the house a lot and I've been training her to throw her dirty diapers in the garbage. We are also discovering what going to the bathroom on the potty means {she even gets to flush}. She hates wearing clothes when it's hot out {as you can see} and her mullet is finally starting to grow out!
she's teething which means there have been A LOT of long long nights (in long long stretches)... we don't get much sleep those nights so we nap hard when we can! Only a few more teeth to go!
on turning 31... and finally learning to "stop and smell the roses"
Have you ever just sat and thought to yourself... wow, this is my life. Actually, I just stopped to reflect what is happening {"stop and smell the roses", as my mom always tells me}... I've been doing that a lot lately, probably because I just celebrated my 31st birthday. I feel like the past 5 years have served to give me everything I'd ever hoped for in my life... and I kinda can't believe it.
My advice {to you... and myself} after turning 31:
LIFE: ...this is a time in life where I'm starting to really appreciate the little things and realizing they are what make up this big picture we call "life". It all started with getting a dream job with one of my besties which has lead me on this crazy journey the past 5 years has given me. From moving to Boston and meeting my one true love, to the tight tight hugs from a tiny body that only a mother knows {who knew?!} my life has been flipped turned upside down {as the fresh prince would say} and moving so quickly... I've grown to understand that life is actually comprised 80% with 'the little things'... and then there are a few (20%) game changers sprinkled in... and that is what has really shaped my life thus far. Take the time... to listen, to talk, to help others... slow down and take time to stop and smell the roses.
LOVE: everyone asks as soon as you get married "has anything changed?"... well not immediately, but with every revolution comes the slow adjustment period... where you adjust into an even stronger bond than you had before. You grow into each other and with each other... mostly because that's the person you love to be around the most. If you decide to become a parent, well, god bless ya & know that this will (seemingly) strengthen any healthy relationship... You will have a new found respect for one another that you never knew could exist...
TIME: time is more valuable than money... something I always sorta knew but is constantly being reinforced. Time with family and friends, time alone to reflect, time spent doing what you love or time spent growing (which is sometimes painful)... With the addition of a child in my life, I've learned that my time is more valuable now than ever before!
MOTHERHOOD: Listen. Nobodies the "perfect" mother... what does that mean anyway? Just do the best you can and listen to your own heart and not what people tell you. You know more than you think you do! Babies don't need all the toys in the store and every marketed product for "learning". What they need is love (& guidance) from mom and dad.
PHOTOGRAPHY: I started calling it "a job" and I am now refraining myself to have that mindset. I do photography because it's what I'm passionate about. I've realized that too much equipment will weigh you down, keep it manageable and be resourceful. Most importantly, in the age of digital don't get carried away with too many images or photoshop! Get it right 'in camera' above all else and GET IT PRINTED!
SOCIAL LIFE: It kinda dies down after you have a little one... lets face it. That's ok though because it makes "going out" that much sweeter and you appreciate going out to eat so much more! It's important to stay off your phone when you're with your friends and family... just put it away, spend the time with the people who are in front of your face! catch up with people online/ social media when you're just sitting around "bored"... If you don't have time for it, so be it. Throw parties with your friends, actually book the plane ticket to fly & see a friend, that 20% of game changer gets juiced from doing something for yourself once in a while. My point is, take the time to strengthen relationships OUTSIDE of social media. And last but not least, IT IS OK TO TALK TO STRANGERS... at this point in your life I think you know people are (for the most part) nice to you when you're nice to them.
So hide your phone away right now and go call a friend or snuggle up with your love!
xo,
April
My Toxic Facebook
About 2 years ago, before Sienna was born, I decided to take facebook off of my phone. It was annoying and I was sick of being "that person" who, while standing around waiting in public, would turn to my phone for amusement. Those people have always gotten on my nerves, why not smile or strike up a convo with a real live person right in front of you? I felt it was almost ruining my creativity because I was no longer observing or looking around me... I simply had my face in my phone 24/7. I also did not want to be "that mom" who's baby was screaming as I said "hold on honey, i'll change your diaper after I update my facebook status". To me, a lot of things in my life needed to go back to the good old fashion way.
So I removed facebook from my phone and that was that. I called it "the cell phone cleanse" I felt great. I no longer cared much about my phone and even lost it from time to time... i know, i'm such a daredevil.
My next "i hate facebook" moment was a few months later when I would find myself, needing to get work done, but instead would find myself sitting at my desktop computer looking at other photographers work via facebook {you cheeky social media addict, you}. Boy did this send me into a downward spiral of depression!!! Talk about creativity killer! I immediately recognized what was happening and de-friended all the photographers I hadn't met in person. In addition, I blocked all of their status updates from showing up on my feed. If you are a photographer reading this, I highly recommend doing this. Nothing is more distracting than looking at others work! Focus on your own.
Well about a month ago I re-lapsed into hating facebook and decided that I wanted to "get off facebook" all together... {geesh, I sound like some sort of addict} so I did... I shut down my personal facebook page and felt... a sigh of relief. It actually felt like a medium size weight was off my shoulders. Well, that only lasted for about... 3-4 days. Something about it made me feel like I was missing out on the rest of the world. What a skewed perception, huh?
So after reading this very spot on article by David duChemin and watching this incredibly scary documentary called Terms & Conditions May Apply on Netflix, and coming across this amazing rant all in the same week... I realized that I need to follow my gutz and just go for it. {What better time did this come than after July 4th... the day that we honor our country and those who fought for our rights that we so take for granted, especially when it comes to privacy.}
So if you want to stay up to date on what's going on in the world of April K Photography or even a few personal stories from little old me, you can do so by visiting this blog on the regular! This is where I'll be hanging out ;)
Peace, Love & Freedom!
p.s. - mom, you were right.... again
Patience in Photography
Hey Comrads, I haven't written a personal post in a while because I've been over here shooting weddings + engagements like mad, meeting new friends via Social Boston Sports (very important for self employed peeps like myself), keeping my veggie garden alive, and booking the coolest couples for 2013 (mega awesome "how we met" stories).
In the midst of my editing, I decided to browse National Geographic (sidenote: it was always my dream to shoot for them… I could totally picture myself scaling a city wall or busting through the jungle in South America just to get the sick shot). See, I always try and keep something besides Facebook as my "go to" when I need a mind break. I'm usually looking for inspiration and nature seems to inspire me the most, so naturally I go to my favorite site, Nationalgeographic.com. Today I came across this post about patience. Something of which I've vastly improved upon over the years, but something that continually needs to be worked on.
Patience is something that I've really been improving upon this wedding season in particular. In my quest to figure out what the most important elements of wedding photography are, patience definitely is at the top of the list. Over the years I've had to consciously tell myself to stop shooting blindly.
Now I've come to that turning point in my photography where I am not so worried about technically shooting the scene. Admittedly, I shoot on manual ALL OF THE TIME! When I first got into photography I was shooting black and white film and the teacher told me that we all need to be able to shoot on manual. Well I learned to do it and now I can't go back to auto settings. This could be good or bad… it depends on the situation. Now my camera and all of it's hundreds of settings is starting to become second nature in quickly trying to figure out what lighting ratio I need in order to nail the lighting in the room for the next 4 minutes.
I'm also learning to just hang out and observe the story, "chill n watch" if you will. Like thinking before you speak, you should CNW before you shoot.
"chill n watch" = If you just slow down, chill out and just watch the scene/people... you can compose a thoughtful piece of art much easier than just shooting and praying you've got a good shot in there somewhere.
Patience in photography is so important whether you're a professional with a fancy shmancy DSLR or you're just a guy with an iphone. Do me a favor, chill out and just watch the next time you compose an image, let me know if it works for you!
{watch video here} --> Patience by NatGeo
{This shot of a young and wild 26 year old April K... Camping with my (fancy for me at the time) Nikon D200… just CNW'ing}
Peace, Love & Patience,
April K